Moon

 26th Jan 2026 dream

I am in a huge hall where shiva is being worshipped. Not seen a massive hall like that. I was around it’s beautiful and worship is going on , lots and lots of people are there, maybe in thousands. I continue to explore everything in the hall praying and I walk around the connecting rooms that are so huge and they all have Aum written in Sanskrit with moon (from Shivas head) it was so beautiful written on ceilings and walls of the walking areas I continue to walk and see Aum fade away and moon is still there drawn in huge format , I walk a long long time I see randomly few people here are there from many religions I realize I have been walking for sometime cause it’s a huge circular walking rooms (like huge room similar to vestibule) then I see Islamic prayer sessions going on in another huge hall must be even larger crowd laks of people , intended to go in but they say I have to be in their religion so  I am not allowed inside. I say I want to go to parking lot through there since it’s a massive hall and I don’t want to again walk back to the main hall and then goto the parking … they say no you have to go that way back, this is not for us in their religion. I say ok and turn back and start walking. One old Muslim lady stops me she’s very old and sitting in an wheel chair looks like. She wants to talk to me I bend down respectfully and talk. She explains about significance of moon and what is Islam and what is God in their religion. And then I notice the same moon of shiva following through entire hall for all religions so moon is just symbolic but it is all shiva leela, and everyone is praying to the same divine province. Shiva was in linga meaning formless and all are essentially praying to the same formless divine ONE in their own interpretation 

Then Sindhu walks in carrying a baby with Chithi chitappa and I go with her somewhere and dream ends

Karma bhakthi jyana

 I see several divine souls that i am not able to recognize guide me. Swami comes and goes but not very clear all the time, but as a friend he’s there guiding 

I see a pond in front of a forest and multiple paths leading to a goal. I tell swami are these paths like karma yoga Bhakti yoga and Jyana yoga , the tough one is jyana yoga and little tougher is bhakthi etc , swami says yes but also who told these are tough, one is more unknown while other is easy and karma yoga is more well lit and straightforward

I also am part of a divine group of people with more powers and closer to swami because they seems to be directly and anytime talking to swami easily. There is a divine angelic lady saying what bharad should we give you more experience (like lucid, and out of body), i reply saying yes but also let it not be just lucid but actual out of body, she says it will be more terrifying is that ok? I respond that no need then, it’s only complicating I only want Swami , not all these silly things unless there is value. She replies saying lucid is only not worth it but real spiritual experiences are not like that. So I hold her hand and say yes then please give those experiences.

And So It ReStarts !!

 After many years, back at my daily sadhana... Have been increasing the intensity and started doing practices..  Felt like experiences should restart else whats the point of increasing intentsity... after a long time, i got fedup and did a 1AM mediatation of taking to higher self, and kundalini meditation... then went to sleep at around 2AM... Lucid started... after a long time it was beautiful... tried to chant Sairam Sairam Sairam... but ended up doing a lot of travel and talking to people , friends, dream within dream, lucid was completely out of control. but atleast no scary stuff. and most definitely fully awake for the longest period of dream.. And so it starts !! hopefully will be able to connect more within and explore further.. Essentially it helps to calm and connect to the self and stay tuned to swami.. otherwise i fully understand its sitll an external experience which is not lasting, so its not the goal.. but instead of doing time pass on other non-interesting this, this time pass is interesting and in a way shows progress in sadhana so its encouraging

27_Jan_2017 morning

I went to sleep at 10 PM woke up at 12 night, couldnt sleep so started reading madhu brothers book. finished reading at 2.30 and then was chatting for half hour and then went to sleep.

astral - i think - maybe not.. woke up, came downstairs , rathi was there, told her u have to see this, if u can see me now, u must believe its astral, i tell her to follow me to upstairs and see my body lying down. she comes and sees my body and says yes u r out of ur body. now am awake out my body but dont know wat to do... i ask her to pinch me to see if i feel sensation, i dont... i tell her its astral body maybe thts why i dont feel pinch. but now its boring,  i look at swamis pic , now what to do. should i fly or go somewhere, whats the use its boring to do it, dont achieve anything anyway so i decide to jus stay there.. am not afraid but jus plain bored, so i decide to wake up in my body. i try hard to wake up, trying to shout and move my body, i succeed and i open my eyes am inside my body, but i see rathi sleeping shes not awake.. so although the me part waking up and loitering is true, the conversation was all fake, maybe it was just a dream... only swami can confirm which he wont so i let it be.

14-jan-2017
thai masam first day, makar sankranthi

maybe it was midnight or too early morning i dont remember

i had a dream before that where it was like a ghost movie where dinesh and i take a train which is supposed to be a ghost destination train and it takes whirlwind route, scary,... and takes me to scary places.. its ok i am little scared but mostly i know itslike a move thing
wake up and goto sleeo... playing with krishna as i say bye to him climbing on a train... i miss the train but somehow push krishna into the train and i  am outside... i run to catch the train, my dad is watching i tell him iwil take a car or auto and catch the train in next station, krishna is there with other relatives though inside train, hopefully he climbed onto the train cause i only helped him climb but not sure if he went inside the trian.. woke up its a dream, i was thinking train is spiritual path, did i miss the train, why did i have to get down the train and play with krishna. went back to sleep thinking that...

astral.. woke up in dream and was flying...  had wings and flying flying , it was like road4 way to office.. trying to fly longer but ended up flying higher , not much control but it was fun to do astral after long time... open my heart and get ready to fly out , heart chakra is ready but then i realize whats the point jus sit there and enjoy, there is nothing there or here, jus sit quiet and enjoy.. its fun... i go back to dream i think at this point maybe still in astral ..i dont know.. i have a call with mohanj its very nice , so i tell him mohanji my swami has told me no meditation just go and serve people thts enough.. he doesnt say anything..i ask him sokmething else he is silent, something else again i talk trying to make him reply to me, he still remains silent.. i am little aware now he wants me to be silent so i am jus quiet.... am sleeping in my bedroom in danville and now i walk to parents bedroom (bigger one) and I see kuppu paati, annapoorni chithi (sushmitas mom), megha and ravi anna (vani akka husband) sitting with krishna.. no one sees me first, i push krishna in the cheeks and only he sees me , they are all helping in packing some luggage and kuppu mami leaves the room for some work.. i tell megha quick take 200rs and put it in kuppu mamis purse, if we give in her hand she wont take, jus put it in her purse... i was told to do so, i dont know who i think its swami... then kuppu mami is with other pattis in the toy room opposite to bedroom so I get a message and i tell megha, give dhahi shakkar, ask kuppu mami to eat curd and sugar , god knows why...i tell to megha... then i realize i am behind time meaning i am in a moment that happened one month ago, so i actually travelled to past, so its a dream not astral (maybe its astral its weird cant explain, as i dont understand) but then i am overwhelmed and thank mohanji and  ask him please involve me in such esoteric missions that keeps me pushing more into spirituality also, not for ego rush but its what we want to be connected...i tell mohanji when are u coming to california meaning visiting our home.. he suddenly swoops down from somehwere and right there he is, and is holding my hand.. he pulls me and makes me sit outside the three doors and i am crying i am in tears seeing his love and his presence right there cause i called him.. he asked me to be quiet and puts his finger on my forehead and i remain silent,... i am crying i am sitting in front of him holding his feet and he is pressing his finger on my forehead ajna chakra.. i want to say something but remain silent .. then he presses my right nostril and i breathe fully through my left nostril and then he presses my left nostrsil and i breathe thru my right nostril... he little bit shakes to make me breathe in one nostril like ...
instantly  woke up to see time as 6.33 AM but clock is 15+ mins fast so must have been 6.15 or so..

did mohanji give me initiation by touching my ajna chakra , did he want me to do pranayama ? or he made me do pranayama so what transpired i dont know.. did he take away something from me cause i told him swami doesnt want me to meditate but only serve ?? i am glad even if he took anything from me or gave me anything, according to me both are same... god gives and takes, both are for our highest good..
2-3months ago when i went to mohanji meditation for the first time he gave me shakthipath.. i know it cause i went numb and so much energy came in that cupertino house ...i was jus stilled in silence with mucuh energy pouring into me when that akka put her hand over my head... so maybe he gave me shakthipath then, and he took away shakthipath from me now, or he gave me more energy by pressing his finger on my forehead, it could mean anything, but either ways i am happy that it was a beautiful dream and i had a blessed holy person interact with me ... it would have been nice if i understand whats going on :) but its always the case where seldom we know whats happening...

morning i wake up call paatti in saidapet and casually ask her about kuppu mami, and i tell her to call her and paatti says they are in hospital as revathi (daughter in law) is not well.. so i tell her give dhahi shakkar (curd and sugar) , paatti says should revathi have, i tell ask both of them to have, but dont ask me anymore questions... i have to ask mom to give them 200rs dont know when the time will come for that, they will look suspicioulsy at me so i have reserved that for now.. will communicate later

end of Oct - swami comes in another form .. comes and puts a pin in me like putting a flag in the shirt pocket, i kind feel the pain of the pin going into my body and twitch a little out of pain and slowly push it away , outside of my body as its paining. Swami notices this and says u want me to put or not I say yes swami please put. Swami says "your actions are opposite of what that needs to be done, when I put pressure you are releasing the pressure, whatever I do you are nullifying it by your actions" .. i was stunned cause its like my life whatever pressure situations i get into I convininetly avoid and get out , not always showing love and caring but try to get out of the place. Swami says Do you want me to put it or not, I immediately open up and tell swami you put it back swami i wil bear any amount of pain its immaterial just put the pin i wont release the pin away, whatever you want my lord is right, whatever i do my lord is wrong, I do it out of ignorance, out of inability to control , the pain itself is not the problem its the ignorance that makes me do my actions. Swami puts the pin and walks away.

Jo Tum Todo Piya Main Nahi Todu Krishna, Tori Prit Todi Krsna Kaun Sang Jodu :'(

19th early morning
just the day before 18th i had lamented so much to a friend about purity and how impure our thoughts are. I know the answers myself but failing to live upto the expectation is a huge burden on the heart cause its not the knowing that matters but the living of ideals. its not even the spiritual experience that occurred in the past but its the awareness of the experience NOW that matters. so after lamenting a lot and vigorously pushing swami to show something some sign or just dont bother, infact i even told that i dont want anymore lectures or be good do good, instead jus make it happen i cannot do it on my own. thats the premise, i go home i watch movie so i dont keep thinking about things, as movies or tv is the easiest way to forget your awareness and at this moment my awareness was more focussed on the confused mind rather than the silence beyond the mind.
The dream is very beautiful. We are in a train journey (poignant) Sln asks me how to control lust :) out of the blue, its a dream and I am not in astral travel, although it could very well be as i was not aware. I explain two points - one we have chosen this, we will have to endure this, its our choice so atleast be happy, two - swami wants it this way, he is watching and he very well knows this is happening so jus try and leave it, dont try to be perfect cause its an illusion of the mind. you know what is right just do it. I dont remember the second point i explained very clearly when i woke up but i remember the first point well. i woke up at the alarm at 4AM and went right back to sleep. I was playing with snakes, not playing but sort of snakes all around, dinesh was wearing a live snake as a belt and he wanted one more belt, i went out of tht room into another room inside some home I see a snake under water, which i believe is dead but not sure, i tell dinesh u can pick this snake urself and wear it as a belt if u want. then i go inside a bigger room i find lot of snakes, and there is a politician or a leader , who has done some crime, so he goes to the police station to explain his situation. But i am enraged at his behaviour I let out the snakes on his kids, letting one kid alive so he does have a kid but for his grave punishment I let the snakes do whatever they want to his other kids. Because the man had committed crime against snakes and let snakes do whatever they want. I am not sure but after sometime i see many many dead snakes and some dead kids presumably that leaders kids, lots of dead snakes. but all this is fine, i have always had snake related dreams but what was important was i tell rathi lets jus leave this god damn place, we are packing to catch a flight (i guess) but before we head out a guy stops me and asks me, bharad, what does this signify, what does the killing of snake mean, i tell him maybe inner bad qualities, animalistic behaviour maybe ? he responds saying yes and more,  i was wondering what more means and i wake up. what is so poignant is that usually its after the dream when i wake up i ask myself what did that dream mean, but this is the first time when i am not doing astral travel that someone actually questions me within that dream, what does this all mean, what does all this happening mean to you, and i am still in that dream and answering him what that happenings meant. anyways i wake up and read about islamic and bible and hindu meanings of snakes and killing of snakes and dead snakes and water snakes and small and big snakes etc and all i read its related to lust and bad qualities and how to overcome and that killing means we are succeeding in quelling our negative qualities...